Dual Military Couples: BAH, Co-location, Deployment & Family Planning Complete Guide

Bottom Line Up Front: Dual military couples each get full BAH (not split) if married with no kids, $2,500-$6,000/month combined (depending on location). Co-location not guaranteed but can request via MACP (Married Army Couples Program) or branch equivalent. Joint assignments: 60-70% success rate if you apply early. Both deploy = Family Care Plan required (designate guardian for kids). Finances: $120K-$180K combined income (E-5/E-5 to O-3/O-3), saves aggressively, retires at 42-45 with dual pensions ($60K-$90K/year) + $1-2M invested.

Dual Military BAH (Housing Allowance)

BAH Rules for Dual Military

Without kids:

• ✅ Each gets WITH-dependent BAH rate (higher rate)
• ✅ Combined BAH: $3,000-$6,000/month (depending on location)
• ✅ Live on base: Keep BAH (doesn't get taken)

With kids:

• ✅ Each gets WITH-dependent BAH rate
• ✅ Same combined BAH: $3,000-$6,000/month
• ✅ Only need one housing (rent one place, pocket surplus)

BAH by Rank (Examples - San Diego 2025)

E-5/E-5 couple:

• E-5 with deps: $3,243/month each
• Combined: $6,486/month
• Live in $2,500 apartment → Pocket: $3,986/month

E-7/E-6 couple:

• E-7: $3,726/month
• E-6: $3,243/month
• Combined: $6,969/month

O-3/O-3 couple:

• O-3: $3,897/month each
• Combined: $7,794/month
• Live on $3,000 → Pocket: $4,794/month

Result: Dual military couples have MASSIVE housing allowance surplus (if you live modestly)

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Co-Location (Getting Assigned Together)

How Co-Location Works by Branch

Army: MACP (Married Army Couples Program)

• Enroll in program (both must enroll)
• Request joint assignments during PCS
• Success rate: 60-70% (not guaranteed)
• Same base OR nearby bases (Fort Bragg + Pope AFB)

Air Force:

• Join Spouse program
• Request same base during assignment process
• Success rate: 65-75%

Navy:

• Co-location via detailer (assignment manager)
• More difficult (ship deployments, sea duty)
• Success rate: 40-50% (lower due to sea duty requirements)

Marines:

• Monitor (assignment manager) considers co-location
• Success rate: 50-60%

Coast Guard:

• Co-location considered
• Success rate: 60-70%

When Co-Location Fails

Separate assignments (common scenarios):

• Both have critical jobs (can't both leave current units)
• One on sea duty, one on shore duty (Navy)
• One OCONUS, one CONUS (different deployment cycles)
• Operational needs override co-location request

Options if separated:

• Geo-bachelor (one stays at assignment, other brings kids)
• Weekend visits (if <4 hour drive)
• Accept separation (short tour = 1 year)
• One person gets out (leave military)

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Deployment Challenges (Dual Military with Kids)

Family Care Plan (REQUIRED)

If you have kids, you MUST have Family Care Plan:

• Designate short-term guardian (deployment <30 days)
• Designate long-term guardian (deployment >30 days)
• Legal documents (power of attorney, guardianship papers)
• Guardian must be willing + able (financially, logistically)

Common guardians:

• Grandparents
• Siblings (with stable home)
• Close family friends

What happens if you don't have one:

• Can't deploy (career killer)
• Administrative action
• Possible separation from military

Simultaneous Deployments

Can both deploy at same time?

• Technically yes (if Family Care Plan in place)
• Often avoided (one parent defers deployment if possible)

Reality:

• Chain of command tries to avoid deploying both parents simultaneously
• But mission needs may require it (especially in high-tempo units)

If both deploy:

• Kids live with designated guardian (6-12 months)
• Video calls, emails (like single-parent deployment)
• R&R visits (if aligned)

Staggered Deployments (Worse?)

Problem:

• Parent A deploys: Jan - Jun (6 months)
• Parent A returns, Parent B deploys: Jul - Dec (6 months)
• Kids have one or both parents gone for 12 months straight

Emotionally harder:

• No "normal" period
• Kids never have both parents home
• Homecoming → immediate deployment (no reintegration time)

Advocacy:

• Request deferment if both on deployment cycle
• Talk to command (explain impact on kids)
• Not guaranteed, but worth asking

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Financial Advantages (Dual Military)

Combined Income (Massive)

E-5/E-5 couple (typical mid-career):

• Base pay: $3,000 each = $6,000/month
• BAH: $3,000 each = $6,000/month
• BAS: $450 each = $900/month
• Total: $12,900/month = $154,800/year

O-3/O-3 couple (officers, 6 years):

• Base pay: $5,500 each = $11,000/month
• BAH: $3,500 each = $7,000/month
• BAS: $300 each = $600/month
• Total: $18,600/month = $223,200/year

Comparison:

• Dual military E-5/E-5: $154K/year
• Civilian couple (median): $70K-$90K/year
• Dual military earns 70-100% more

Savings Potential (FIRE Path)

E-5/E-5 couple:

• Income: $12,900/month
• Live on: $5,000/month (modest)
• Save: $7,900/month = $94,800/year

After 10 years:

• Saved: $948,000 (at 10% growth)
• Ages: 32-38
• Can retire early or coast to military retirement

At 20 years (retire from military):

• Dual pensions: $30,000 + $30,000 = $60,000/year (for life)
• Investments: $1.5M - $2M
• Financially independent at age 42-45

Dual TSP (Thrift Savings Plan)

Each can max TSP:

• $23,000/year each = $46,000/year combined
• BRS 5% match each = $8,000/year combined
• Total annual retirement savings: $54,000

After 20 years at 10% growth:

• TSP balance: $2.5M - $3M combined

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Family Planning (Kids + Dual Military)

Pregnancy & Maternity Leave

Maternity leave:

• 12 weeks paid (for birth mother)
• Convalescent leave: 6 weeks (recovery)
• Primary caregiver leave: +6 weeks (total 12 weeks)

Paternity leave:

• 12 weeks paid (for non-birth parent)
• Primary caregiver leave (if primary caregiver)
• OR secondary caregiver: 21 days

Dual military:

• Birth mother: 12 weeks
• Partner: 12 weeks
• Can stagger leave = 24 weeks combined (if command allows)

Childcare Options

On-base CDC (Child Development Center):

• Cost: $150-$600/month (income-based)
• Hours: 6 AM - 6 PM (covers most duty hours)
• Wait list: 6-12 months (sign up EARLY)

Off-base daycare:

• Cost: $800-$2,000/month
• More flexible hours (some 24/7 for shift workers)

Family (grandparents):

• Free childcare (if nearby)
• Dual military: Often PCS far from family

Au pair:

• Live-in caregiver from another country
• Cost: $400-$600/week ($1,600-$2,400/month)
• Covers irregular hours (deployments, TDY)

Career Impact (Who Stays In?)

Common decision points:

Both stay in (20+ years):

• ✅ Dual pensions ($60K-$90K/year)
• ✅ Financial independence
• ❌ Hard on kids (moves, deployments)
• ❌ Relationship strain (separations)

One gets out (spouse stays home):

• ✅ Stable home for kids
• ✅ One parent always present
• ❌ Lose one income (but still have military pay + BAH)
• ❌ Lose dual pensions (only one retirement)

Both get out (transition together):

• ✅ Civilian life, control over location
• ✅ Both pursue careers
• ❌ Lose military benefits (healthcare, pension)
• ❌ Harder transition (both job hunting)

Decision factors:

• Kids' ages (young = harder with dual military)
• Career goals (both want to stay in?)
• Deployment tempo (constant separations?)
• Relationship health (surviving dual military stress?)

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Dual Military Relationship Challenges

Time Apart (Deployments, TDY, Schools)

Average time apart per year:

• Deployments: 6-12 months (staggered or simultaneous)
• TDY: 1-3 months
• Schools (PME, training): 1-6 months
• Total: 8-18 months apart over 2-3 year period

Impact:

• Strain on marriage (communication, intimacy)
• Kids feel abandoned (both parents gone)
• Missed milestones (birthdays, graduations)

Coping strategies:

• Video calls (daily if possible)
• Letters, care packages
• Strong Family Care Plan (kids have stability)
• Marriage counseling (Military OneSource = free)

Career Competition

Problem:

• Both want promotion
• Only one can PCS to "good" assignment (career-enhancing)
• One sacrifices career for other

Example:

• You: Offered assignment in Hawaii (great for career)
• Spouse: Stuck at current base (no openings in Hawaii)
• Decision: You take Hawaii (geo-bachelor) OR decline (hurt career)

Solution:

• Take turns (you sacrifice this PCS, they sacrifice next)
• One person gets out (mutual agreement)
• Both accept that dual military = compromise

Different Branches (Extra Complexity)

Army + Air Force:

• Co-location easier (many joint bases)
• Different cultures (Army = hooah, Air Force = cushier)

Navy + Marine Corps:

• Marine often assigned to Navy base (co-location possible)
• Sea duty = separations

Army + Navy:

• Very difficult co-location (Army = land bases, Navy = ports)
• Often live apart

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Action Steps

Before Marriage:

1. ✅ Discuss: How long will both stay in? (20 years? One gets out?)
2. ✅ Research: Co-location programs (MACP, Join Spouse)
3. ✅ Plan: Finances (how to save, investment goals)

After Marriage:

1. ✅ Enroll in co-location program (MACP, etc.)
2. ✅ Update DEERS (military ID, benefits)
3. ✅ Max TSP (both contribute 5% minimum for BRS match)
4. ✅ Live below BAH (save surplus)

If Having Kids:

1. ✅ Create Family Care Plan (before pregnancy ends)
2. ✅ Get on CDC wait list (ASAP, 6-12 month wait)
3. ✅ Discuss: Who takes maternity/paternity leave when?

Every PCS:

1. ✅ Request co-location (doesn't guarantee but helps)
2. ✅ Plan for worst case (geo-bachelor, family stays behind)
3. ✅ Review finances (can you afford dual housing if separated?)

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Related Guides

• Military Marriage and BAH Complete Guide
• Dual Military Deployment Survival
• Military FIRE: Financial Independence

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Remember: Dual military is HARD (deployments, separations, career conflicts) but LUCRATIVE ($120K-$220K/year, dual pensions, early FIRE). Communicate constantly (about career goals, family, finances), use co-location programs, build strong Family Care Plan, and save aggressively. Thousands of dual military couples make it work - you can too.